


The Game Is On

by FirebirdScratches



Category: Venom (Movie 2018)
Genre: Not very shippy?, Other, maybe if you squint
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-10-15
Updated: 2018-10-15
Packaged: 2019-08-02 16:19:32
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 703
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/16308566
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/FirebirdScratches/pseuds/FirebirdScratches
Summary: I've had writer's block for well over a year, but we saw Venom and Frostyemma challenged me to write a thousand word fic and...I don't even know if this is a thousand words or not? So....*flings this at you and runs away*





	The Game Is On

**Author's Note:**

  * For [FrostyEmma](https://archiveofourown.org/users/FrostyEmma/gifts).



“So….Venom.”

 

**Eddie.**

 

“Your name…is. Venom.”

 

**I do not like your tone.**

 

“No, there’s no tone, it’s just…I dunno. A little bad-ass, you know?”

 

**It is very bad ass.**

  
“Right, that’s what I mean. It’s like what a thirteen year old boy would name himself if he could pick his own name, you know?”

 

**I am not a thirteen year old boy.**

 

“So…what, like…Momma Squid just popped you out of her…whatever, and was like - ‘I know! Venom! Doesn’t he look like a Venom, dear?’” 

 

**I am NOT A SQUID.**

 

“Ow! Hey!”

 

**Stop hitting yourself.**

 

“Would you - ?!”

 

**Stop hitting yourself.**

 

“OKAY OKAY FINE. Venom is a totally normal, totally…cool, badass…name.” 

 

**Correct.**

 

“I’m sure it’ll look super rad when you scribble it in Sharpie on your jeans. Jesus.” 

 

**I AM OLDER THAN YOU.**

 

“GAh! Stop YELLING!”

 

**Besides, they would be your jeans.**

 

“Just - no YELLING in my head? Okay? I am RIGHT here. There is no reason to yell inside my head, like - ever.” 

 

**You are the one with legs. And the one who wears clothes. I am all the clothes I need.**

 

“Whatever, hippie.”

 

**Change the channel.**

 

“NO. We talked about this.”

 

**It is boring.**

 

“If you bothered to learn the rules -

 

**I KNOW THE -**

 

“Hey. What did we just talk about?”

 

**…**

 

“Thank you.”

 

**I know the rules. I know everything that is in your head. I don’t see the point of changing the location of a ball to gain an abstract victory.**

 

“These guys make millions of dollars. That ain’t abstract.” 

 

**There isn’t even any blood.**

 

“Stop pouting. Besides, sometimes there’s blood.”

 

**Pfft. Hardly ever.**

 

“Oh! Ohhhh oh oh oh!” 

  
  
**Yes, look at the little men run. Thrilling.**

 

“TOUCHDOOOOOOWN!”

 

**Put on Queer Eye. I want Queer Eye.**

 

“Qu - what?! When the hell have you - ”

 

**It is boring when you sleep. Sometimes I walk you to the living room and we watch Netflix.**

 

“….okay. That’s creepy, and we’re putting a pin in that, but - the point is, no, you can NOT watch _Queer Eye,_ because I _told_ you, we’re watching the _game_ today.” 

 

**You could learn from them Eddie. We need to step up our game if we want to win Anne back.**

 

“Step up our-?! Man, you are not gonna let me enjoy this game even a little bit are you?”

 

**You should tuck your shirt in. But only in the front.**

 

“Jesus H. Christ.”

 

**It is called a French Tuck.**

 

“I don’t give a French Fuck.”

 

**Heh. Fuck. Cursing is fun. Fuck, fuck, fuck fuck.**

 

“They don’t have cursing where you’re from?” 

 

**No. We do not curse, we _attack._ Humans have many strange ways to channel their aggression. Like… _football._**

 

“See, I can’t even see your face right now but I know you just made a face.”

 

**Thirsty. More beer.**

 

“You read my mind.”

 

**We should call Anne.**

 

“No.”

 

**I’m calling her.**

 

“Hey! Would you - stop! STOP! That’s my - arm - you are being - 

 

**Stop resisting.**

 

“This is NOT what we agree - heyyyyyyyyy! Anne!” 

 

**Tuck in your shirt.**

 

“It’s uh - no! No, nothing serious, everything’s fine, I was just…watching the game, well - TRYING to watch the game.”

 

**Ask her about her career. Affirm her aspirations.**

 

“Affirm her - what?! No, no sorry Anne, he’s just - _chatty_ today.”

 

**Hi Anne! Say hi. Hi to Anne. Hi.**

 

“He’s very insistent that I say hello for him.”

 

**NOT HELLO, “HI.” SAY HI, IT IS CASUAL.**

 

“HI. He says ‘Hi.’ Very LOUDLY.” 

 

**Her career aspirations. Affirm them.**

 

“So, how’s…work?”

 

**Now ask her to mate with us.**

 

“I GOTTA GO. Sorry, I - sorry. Bye.”

 

**That went well. Soon she will be ours again.**

 

“GAH! Just…ONE DAY. ONE fucking day I wanted to sit here and watch the game and have a beer like a normal…just a fucking…normal…”

 

**…**

 

“…”

 

**You can unmute the television.**

 

“What’s the point? You’re not gonna let me watch anyway.”

 

**…**

 

“…”

 

**Unmute the television.**

 

“…”

 

**We will watch football.**

 

“Thank you.”

 

**…**

 

“…”

 

**Eat more Doritos.**

 

“No.”

 

**We want more Doritos.**

 

“We’re gonna get fat.”

 

**Don’t care.**

 

“Yeeeeah me neither.” 

 

**Mmm. Good.**

 

“Augh, could you…I just wanna lick my own fingers, ok?”

 

**Sorry.**

 

“It’s fine. Honestly? You know what? Go to town. What the fuck.”

 

**Mm. Spicy Nacho.**


End file.
